103 lessons people often learn too late in life (a little manual for life)

By Thomas Oppong

How you approach life says a lot about who you are.

To succeed in life, you must be in a constant state of adaptation — continually unlearning old ‘rules’, relearning new ones and doing more of what makes you come alive.

Most people operate on autopilot, doing the same things today that didn’t work yesterday. They are caught in a cycle.

They rarely stop to measure the impact of their actions on themselves and others, and how those actions affect their total well-being.

These are some of the most powerful lessons I have learned over the years.

I chose to make a list because it’s easier to digest. Sometimes less is more. You can easily ponder over each lesson quickly and apply them to your life.

• How you spend your time is how you spend your life.
• Discovering your own reasons for living ( what the Japanese call ikigai) can bring you fulfillment, happiness and make you live longer.
• The secret to happiness is the acceptance of your authentic self.
• The best investment you can make is in yourself.
• The stories you tell yourself to establish your self-identity, give your life meaning, help you to make sense of the world, and guide your actions.
• Don’t think about why you question, simply don’t stop questioning.
• Pay yourself first: save 10% of what you earn.
• Take responsibility for your life or someone will choose your destiny.
• Create your own definition of success.
• You can’t control everything — but you can control how you respond.
• Worry is a waste of time; it’s a misuse of your imagination.
• Learn to see the extraordinary in the ordinary.
• Meaning” is a good thing. Life is pretty useless without it.
• Think progress, not perfection.
• Your ambition, goal, or even ideas means nothing without execution.
• Constant worrying, negative thinking, and always expecting the worst can take a toll on your emotional and physical health.
• When you waste a moment, you have killed it in a sense.
• Don’t think about why you question, simply don’t stop questioning.
• You don’t rely on data or facts. You push the impossible.
• Time, not money, is your most valuable asset.
• We don’t always need “major” events to feel happy. Small moments of joy can quickly add up to make you happy.
• Do what you should. Don’t talk about what you should be doing.
• The human mind is the most adaptable tool there is — make it work for you in times of crisis. No matter what happens, you can adapt and stay calm.
• Sometimes changing the game means YOU doing the actual changing.
• Growth begins at the end of your comfort zone.
• Don’t over-plan and under-act!
• Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.
• You have three choices in life: Give up, give in, or give it all you’ve got.
• Don’t invest in a career. Build a life. Take your dreams seriously.
• Decide what you want or someone else will.
• Everything is on you. No one is coming to save you. You are in charge. Embrace this mindset and you can change your life.
• If you commit to nothing, you’ll be distracted by everything.
• Progress is the ultimate motivation.
• Once you commit to getting started, momentum carries you.
• In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.
• Weird is who we are, the best parts, not perfect, not trying.
• Pursue your ultimate potential, anything less is not worthy of your time.
• Perfect is great, but you can’t afford it. None of us can.
• The bigger the why, the greater the impact and the stronger the drive.
• The obstacle isn’t something standing in our way. It’s the way itself.
• Great work, like a healthy financial portfolio, takes time to mature.
• Whatever you do, stay on the path of inquiry for better solutions for your personal experiences.
• There are no specific answers. But there are definitely better questions. Don’t just focus on questions that will validate your own assumptions.
• You don’t have to fit in. You are not required to be like everybody.
• Your learning is never complete. Determine to live fully and continually learn aim to become better than you were yesterday.
• Your personal reality determines what you can achieve tomorrow. What you think you become and what you imagine you create.
• Confidence kills more dreams than talent. Learn to improve your perception of yourself.
• Your life is right now. Life is a series of right nows. Learn to love your life right now, and you’ll have an amazing life.
• Your success is your own responsibility. You alone have the power to create the life you want.
• Much of life is wasted on worry, regret and pain. Focus on things you can control.
• Your life is now. Your happiness is now. Your productivity is now. Do more of what makes you come alive today.
• Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s dream. Pursue your true north.
• Life is so much easier when you see the brighter side in everything in life. Your sanity depends on it.
• Stop comparing yourself to people. Live to prove things to yourself not others.
• Books can change your life. Never underestimate the valuable lessons you can learn from the experiences of others.
• If you don’t believe in yourself, nobody will. If you act confident, you will become more confident.
• Usefulness is the meaning of life. The contribution is the meaning of life. Experience is the meaning of life.
• Learn by doing. It’s the only way to acquire skills faster. It’s the best approach to gather experiences that shape you as a person.
• There are no universal or golden rules. Learn to make your own rules to pursue your personal trajectory.
• Life is unpredictable. It’s not linear. Everything won’t go as planned. Prepare for the unexpected so it doesn’t become a shock.
• Be antifragile. If you’re resilient and something bad happens, you figure out a way to bounce back.
• Take 100% responsibility for everything that happens in your life. This mindset can help you stop making excuses.
• Stop trying to please everyone. Trying to please everyone and waiting for acceptance will get you exhausted very fast.
• Invest in your personal growth. Invest in something that enriches your life will change your life.
• Invest your time prudently. Life is an investment, and you are what you invest. Defend your time like your life depends on it.
• Many experiences in life that bring happiness are in your control. The more choices you are able to exercise, and control, the happier you are likely to be.
• Taking a few minutes to think about how you want to spend your time will reduce the amount of regret you may feel in the future.
• Make memories. Don’t collect things. Memories last a lifetime.
• Perspective is a choice. A narrative is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Attitude is a choice. Choose wisely.
• Life offers us the privilege, opportunity, and responsibility to do more of what brings out the best in us and provide value for others.
• You can’t control how other’s behave, but you can always choose how you respond to their actions.
• There is no single best way to save or invest. And there’s no right way to be productive or do your best work.
• Good decisions and proactive actions are not always rational — they are relative. There are many roads to many successful lives.
• For every idea, opinion or argument, ask yourself: Do I know this for sure, or have I simply landed on a comfortable spot?
• Nobody cares if you fail. Your biggest critic is yourself. Stop worrying about what other people think and be yourself boldly.
• If you don’t deliberately choose to spend your life yourself, other people will spend it for you.
• Every second you spend comparing your life to someone else’s or wishing you were had someone else’s life is a second spent wasting yours.
• Life is an experiment. Keep an open mind about your experiences, lessons and always keep measuring and improving your “nuggets”.
• To make the most of life, don’t focus on what you are missing, don’t think you are sacrificing — think smart choices and better outcomes.
• The secret to finding momentum and purpose in all areas of life is your sole responsibility — you are in charge.
• What you focus your mind on grows bigger. Be careful about how you spend time in your head.
• Get a regular dose of nature. Every day, connect with nature in some way, large or small. Your mental well-being depends on it.
• If something matters to you put it on your calendar. If it’s a goal you want to achieve, put it on the calendar.
• Have a reason to get up in the morning. Nothing will come to you if you don’t go after it a little bit every day.
• Nothing turns out exactly how we want it. Life is long. Reality is chaos. Keep moving in the face of obstacles.
• Become a lifelong learner. Approach each day as a chance to learn. Keep questioning your beliefs, perceptions and worldviews.
• Finding happiness or fulfillment is a process that requires a deep understanding of yourself at the core level.
• Your life purpose consists of the central motivating aims of your life — the reasons you get up in the morning apart from making money.
• Nobody knows how to run your life better than you. Take control and move in the direction of your dreams and goals. Your happiness depends on it.
• Your brain is designed to do more of what’s easy and comfortable. To do more great work, push the boundaries and step outside your safe bubble.
• Never underestimate the power of being the first to truly believe in yourself. Your growth depends on it.
• Don’t expect to achieve worthwhile if you spend your life trying to please others. You don’t need permission or acceptance to become your best self.
• You’re already ready. Action is the effect and cause of motivation. Stop waiting for a perfect day to take action.
• You are the author of your destiny. You get to write your own story. You get to choose how you want everything to play out. Choose wisely.
• A meaningful life is what you define it to be. Decide what makes life worth living for you, and then design your life around that.
• You can push yourself further than you think. You have more strength, more resilience, and more inner wisdom than you give yourself credit for.
• Build healthy habits that will pay off one hundredfold. You will feel amazing every single day.
• Every little experience in life counts. Don’t let the bigger picture steer you away from the small enjoyments of life.
• Your life is your signature creation. It is your duty to live true to yourself, with authenticity. Your life’s mission is to express yourself boldly, create what you love and love what you create.
• Your mind has a way of rising to the occasion. Challenge it, and it will reward you.
• The sum of the little things matter much more than the big things — cherish every little moment in life.
• The best way to live a worthwhile life is simple: continuously grow as an individual and aim to be consistently useful.
• Everyone is still learning. There are no right answers, fundamental truths or holy grails. There are only lessons learned. What works for me, may not work for you.

This article originally appeared in Medium.

Source: theladders.com

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